Angels We Are Not
by Gnomea
Summary: AH. OOC. He was here in this situation he was most afraid of. The one thing he was scared would happen to them. It was the beginning of the end of their story. ExB
1. Chapter 1 It's always too late

**Twilight is not mine. Obviously**.

**Thank you to _A__ Jasper For Me_ for helping me with this chapter.**

**This story was inspired by the banner the beautiful _heatherdawn_ had made. Lucky for me, she agreed for me to adopt it. ;D**

* * *

**Chapter 1 – It's always too late**

The faint scent of freesia lingered. _Her smell_. It assaulted my senses, sending my emotions into overdrive.

My heart was racing as I scanned the whole bedroom. Everything looked the same from where I was standing. But I knew better.

Inane things like the books she leaves on the bedside table were no longer there and her usual clutter of things were absent. Our bedroom was stripped of everything that would serve as a reminder she had lived here before. It was bare of her.

Just as I suspected it would be. Especially after that disastrous phone call.

It was finally here, the one thing that scared me the most.

Her leaving.

Somewhere in the back of my mind I had suspected she would eventually do this. My apprehension on her leaving my pathetic ass would always increase after I had hurt her. But lucky for me, she never did. Not until now.

She had forgiven me countless times before and I was just cavalier to think she would just shrug it off again and forget about it.

Maybe it was long overdue.

I could not even fault her for what she had done.

But it still stunned me to great proportions. Because she had told me forever and I believed her.

As I had stepped off the plane earlier I had a weird feeling, like a premonition of sorts that she wouldn't be here any longer waiting for me like she usually did.

My suspicion finally confirmed when I arrived at our apartment half an hour ago. I saw for myself that she was truly gone from my life. What I had done hit me with a force I had never expected. Her absence in the only sanctuary I know made it all real – my stupidity…the pain of her gone…the guilt…the longing.

The letter she had left was clutched in my trembling hands. As if by holding it tightly would make her materialize in front of me.

I was too much of a coward. Now she had reached her breaking point and left me. It was too late for regrets. She was no longer here to beg forgiveness from.

Even if I wanted to right my wrong, I didn't even know where to start.

How could I have traded her for my family's money?

There wouldn't be any tiny hands to hold for comfort. No sweet lips to kiss. No eyes to stare at and lose myself into. No beautiful smile to render me speechless.

All because I was stupid in my quest for my mother's approval.

Now there was only silence surrounding me. Emptiness.

Maybe if I had enough balls to stand for what I had wanted, then maybe she might still be here. So many maybes and what ifs…but no reprieve.

I slowly opened the crumpled letter in my hands and I gazed down at her sloppy handwriting. The words pierced my heart like a lance. As I reread all she had written, the tears I had been holding started falling and staining the crisp paper.

Her wedding and engagement rings were digging into my palm as I clenched my hand tightly. The symbol of her promise was left behind with me.

She said goodbye the only way she knew how. The only way I would listen.

I was definitely hearing her now. Loud and clear. As if she had spoken the written words to me herself.

She had repeatedly mentioned in her letter that she didn't want me to look for her. That this was for the best.

What the hell was I going to do now?

* * *

_**Thanks for reading. ;D **_

_**Tell me what you think of this. **_


	2. Chapter 2 Looking through glass

**Twilight is not mine. Obviously**.

**Thank you to _A__ Jasper For Me_ for helping me with this chapter.**

* * *

**Chapt****er 2 – Looking through glass**

It had been six weeks. Forty-two days since she left.

It had taken me a lot longer to find her than I expected, but I was here now, sitting in a car across the street from her apartment, fidgeting and feeling stupid. Not knowing exactly what to do, I just stayed seated inside my rental car, going over my non-existent plan. My heart had been hammering in my chest ever since I had arrived in this quaint town she had chosen to live.

As I waited for God knows what, my stomach fluttered in nervousness. I had been sitting here for over an hour, contemplating whether to knock on her door or not.

Just as I had gathered enough courage to get out and take a step towards where I knew she was, the door to her apartment opened. I gasped in surprise and panic. Even though I was a good few feet away and there was a chance she wouldn't see me, the anxiety flooded through me and I felt my body tremble. I wasn't prepared for this, however much I convinced myself that I was.

I ducked back inside the Volvo, quickly breathing a sigh of relief that she didn't seem to have noticed me. I planned to rectify that soon though. Whether or not my nerves would betray me, I planned to talk to her…and that was that.

My eyes stayed with her as she moved. It seemed she would just be walking to wherever she planned to go. As I contemplated on what I would do, I had the chance to check out her appearance. She was still so beautiful. Paler in complexion than the last time I saw her, but her skin still looked as creamy smooth, her cheek tainted with that pinkish glow that deepened every time she would blush. She was still thin, but I could clearly see the bump in her belly. The sight of her belly made me remember that disastrous phone call and I literally cringed.

What I had said about the baby was the final coffin to our marriage. I didn't mean any of those vile words that came out of my mouth that day, but she didn't know that. I had regretted saying it once the words were out of my mouth, but the presence of my mother prevented me from explaining that to her. Maybe if I had apologized then, even if it was through the phone, she would still be with me today…or maybe not.

Looking back, I never remembered an instance where I had put her first. That alone warranted her to leave me. It was her patience and unselfishness that made her stay with me as long as she did…until she could no longer.

She was almost a block away when I slowly slid out of the car again. I could still see her profile amongst the people walking around the business district of this town she fled to…Forks.

Walking faster, I craned my neck to see her and concentrated on not losing her. The town was small, but I was a stranger here so I could easily get lost. As she rounded the corner of the block, she stopped to talk to a small pixie woman. The woman looked so familiar, but at the moment I couldn't place her.

Putting a good distance between us, I tried not to be spotted. I knew I was stalling, but I was so goddamned afraid of what her reaction to me would be. I couldn't even comprehend how I would feel if she wouldn't forgive me.

As I walked the cemented side streets, I couldn't help but think how I ended up in this situation. Bella and I started out great, amazingly so. Nobody could've guessed she would leave me after three years of marriage.

I had met her in Paris one summer, almost four years ago. I was there for a business meeting. It was my first time to handle an account for Cullen Holdings, Inc. and the pressure to close that deal was stressing me out. I was out one night, smoking a cigarette as I walked through the Marco Polo garden that occupied the southern half of the Jardin de l'Observatoire, one of Paris' most popular parks. It was there on the centerpiece of the garden that I saw her. She was sitting on the edge of the fountain, getting wet by the water sprinkling the statues. She was turned away from me, and guessing from the way she giggled and the low splashing sound that I could hear, I instantly knew she was playing with the water like a child.

The sound of her laughter had me intrigued, so I had moved closer in an attempt to observe her without being noticed. Fate had other plans though. She turned around just as I closed the gap between us and caught my eyes. I almost gasped out loud in surprise. She had the most beautiful face I had ever seen. The combination of her sweet smile and her wet appearance took my breath away…literally.

She was sweet and smart, and I was already enamored that first encounter at the park. That night was the first of many nights we had spent together in Paris, doing nothing but enjoying each other's company. By the end of two weeks, I knew I was in love. It was a very surprising event on my part since I was not one to believe in such trivial things. But for whatever reason, I knew for certain then that I loved her. The brown-eyed beauty from the park captured not only my heart, but also my soul. There was no doubt about it. However, our time together in Paris was limited because I needed to go back to Chicago. In the small amount of time we were together, she had become my world and I didn't want to have the option to live without her.

She was from a wealthy family in Arizona. She was working in their family-owned advertising firm at that time, and was just visiting some friends in Paris. I was too afraid to lose what was a budding romance between us, that I had asked her to marry me on a whim. I was shocked when the words left my lips, but what surprised me the most was when she said 'yes'. When the initial shock of her accepting wore off, I was ecstatic that she would be mine legally.

A month after my unexpected proposal, we were married in an elaborate and grand wedding that my mother had insisted we needed. Believing I owed my mother the wedding she wanted for her only son, I had coaxed Bella into agreeing, even though I knew my wife-to-be wasn't too keen on doing things on a grand scale. I shrugged off the disappointment that flickered through Bella's eyes when I had informed her of the list my mother gave me on how she wanted my wedding, our wedding, to be. I had thought at that time that appeasing my mother with the way she wanted things done was a way to earn her forgiveness or whatever you want to call it. I knew my mother was disappointed that I had chosen to marry a girl she didn't know, or more like one who wasn't within our inner circle. Not to mention, I had only known Bella less than a month before I proposed to her. My mother, Esme, was a lot of things and being picky was inherent in her. I had told my mother in so many words that I loved Bella and would marry her. Nothing would change that, even if my mother wouldn't give me her blessing on my impending nuptial. That was the first time I had gone against her wishes. She might have heard or seen something in my expression when I had said those words, because she finally agreed with the exception she got to plan our wedding. In my opinion, it was a small price to pay. I didn't even consider whether Bella would be insulted or not. I just had to marry her, even if it was my mother planning it like it was her own damn wedding. Bella never said anything, just silently agreed until we finally wed.

I shook my head to dispel all the images. They were both good and bad memories, but it wouldn't do me any good now. It wouldn't help.

The cold November air made me shiver and I clutched my trench coat closer to my body. I followed my wife, but still tried to stay a few feet away. My clothes definitely set me apart from the locals and made me more conspicuous. Luckily, I wasn't spotted yet. I saw Bella walking with the girl she had hugged, her hand on the arm of the pixie as they crossed the street. They were laughing and it made my heart constrict. I wasn't the one who was making her laugh that musical laugh any longer. Regret hit me full force and I had to rein it in. I stopped, deciding whether to move across the street to follow them or just stay where I was. The other street was less deserted and I would definitely be seen if I did.

I stood stoic as I bore my gaze on her back. As she neared the door of what looked like a restaurant, she turned her head, scanning the surroundings as if looking for something. _Probably me_. Suddenly my breathing halted because her brown orbs were boring holes on me. I could see her face - it was blank. My heart was pounding loudly against my chest as she continued to stare at me with a look that was making me uncomfortable. I waited for her to acknowledge me. Smile. Frown. Scowl. Whatever. Just make some expression to tell me what she was feeling.

Nothing.

My chest started to constrict again and this time it felt as if a vice was gripping it. I closed my eyes and opened them quickly, afraid that she would vanish into thin air. She was still standing and staring.

I wanted to cross the street to her, but I couldn't move. It was like I was stuck. Maybe because she wasn't doing anything to suggest she wanted me moving.

As I stared, praying silently to a God I never talked to before, she broke her gaze and turned away from me.

I felt like I died when she did that. She was always the one who would soothe me and make the first step towards our reconciliation, regardless if it was my fault or not. She was always making amends.

Now, I just stared after her as she entered the restaurant, wishing I was just making all these things up in my head.

I waited for her to come out and run toward me. I waited and waited, but she never came. Not this time.

* * *

**_Next chapter will be longer...I promise. Anyway, thanks for reading. ;) Please review._**


	3. Chapter 3 Rings,papers& broken promises

**Twilight is not mine. Obviously**.

**Thank you to _A__ Jasper For Me_ for helping me with this chapter.**

* * *

**Chapt****er 3 – Rings, papers and broken promises**

I was playing with her wedding ring, peeking through the hole to see the white ceiling of my room. The engraved words underneath were my vows to her. It was written in French, a tribute to the city where we had first met.

_Mon amour est à jamais_.

_My love is forever_. That was what it meant. As I stared at the engravings, the words stared back at me. Taunting me. Those words etched in the platinum band were a reflection of my true feelings for her. I still had so much faith in what they meant. She, on the other hand, didn't anymore. That was why I was holding her wedding ring. She had returned it to me, severing her ties to me. The promise she would love me forever was broken the moment she had left. The symbol of a broken promise was in my hands, cold and hard.

I had planned to return this ring to her finger as soon as I could. However and whatever way I could. I wanted it so badly I could taste it. However, planning and doing were entirely different things.

I was still nowhere near getting her back because I was still a fucking coward. Until now, I allowed fear to grip my existence.

The fear that she would never forgive me kept on nagging me, making me hesitate to move things along. There was a high possibility she would not excuse what I did easily this time around. That was what made me procrastinate.

This was my plan at the moment. Avoidance.

By doing this, I delayed the inevitable pain. Deep down, I knew she was moving on without me. It hurts. It fucking hurts so much to deal.

It was good to circumvent. This way, I could still dream she was mine. That everything was fine in our world…that we were still happy.

But just like everything else, fate didn't allow me to just ignore what was really happening. My phone started ringing. It was my lawyer. Bella had file for divorce.

_Fuck! _

Another blow. Another excruciating pain. I cried another set of tears, sobbing until I had none left.

xxxxxxxxxx

Knock! Knock!

This was now or never. I had finally done it.

I stood outside her door, waiting for her to answer as my heart raced against my chest. I tried to control the tremors that shook my body; afraid she would see how vulnerable I was. I didn't know why I didn't want her to see me like this. Like the complete mess that I was. The hollow shell she had left behind.

Opening the door just wide enough, she stood with that cool composure she had the other week. The only difference was she acknowledged me and allowed me to enter.

"Edward," she greeted, while she motioned for me to sit. Her gaze shifted to the divorce papers I had brought, the same one her attorney sent mine for me to sign. She didn't say anything about the legal document and I didn't either. She just moved her eyes away and I laid it down on the table.

She looked thinner and paler than the last time I saw her. I held my tongue from preaching about her health. It was not as if I didn't tell her to risk herself by aborting the fetus that was in her womb.

Her close proximity was making me lose my control. The urge to engulf her in my arms was great but I refrained myself from doing so.

"Why?" I asked hoarsely. Hell, the number of weeks I had rehearsed all the things I wanted to say to her and when I was given the opportunity that was all that came out. _Crap!_

For a moment we stared at each other, relishing in the comfort of seeing each other this close again, before she turned around to go to the kitchen as if she didn't hear me. She came back with some cookies and apple cranberry juice. The sight of her favorite snacks made me melancholy but I shook the feeling away. She placed the tray of food in front of me on the coffee table but made no move to sit down.

My eyes were with her the whole time and I didn't pull my gaze away. I needed some answers. I knew I wouldn't like what she would be saying. That was the reason for my avoidance.

But I was here now. I couldn't delay any longer. I needed to know where I stood with her, where we would be going from here.

"Why, Bella?" I asked again. This time my words had more force and more conviction that warranted an answer from her.

"You should know the answer to that, Edward," she said so seriously and so simply that it was already affecting my resolve.

She was right, though. I knew why she had left me. I had fucked up so many times, in so many ways. But like some masochist, I wanted her to say it to me face to face. I needed to hear it from her to solidify that this was real and not some kind of nightmare or hallucination I had conjured up. My heart was hammering so loudly in my chest; it was the only sound I could hear. The anticipation was making me sweat, albeit the cold weather. I knew the pain was coming but I held my composure, still so afraid to show her I was really a weakling.

She placed her hand on the small bulge on her stomach and started rubbing, as if she was drawing some kind of strength from that simple gesture. She raised her eyes to me and I was lost…more than I was before…because now, her emotions were reflecting through those brown orbs.

"You know I love you, Edward," she said meaningfully but her eyes were so sad. "But love isn't enough anymore."

I thought I was ready to hear it. I really thought I could. Only a minute ago I was coaxing her…no, more like demanding her to tell me. But her every word cut through me like glass, and I felt my knees start to tremble. I was afraid I couldn't hold my weight any longer, so I sat down. She had said the words that scared me the most. My love wasn't enough anymore. It wasn't keeping her to me.

I had failed miserably… in making her feel she was everything to me…or that my promise of forever wasn't a lie.

I put my hands on my face to get some semblance of control, to get a grip of my emotions that were raging inside. My chest was so tight that I had difficulty breathing.

I willed my body to numb and not feel anything so I would be able to function while I was still here with her. I could break down later…much later where she couldn't see me.

Her eyes were the saddest I ever saw them. Before I could try to analyze what she was feeling, she turned around with what looked like a resigned expression on her face.

After sitting and finally getting my emotions in check, I went in search of her. I found her curled on the bed, inside what I assumed was her bedroom, her arms wrapped around her waist. I just stood there for a couple of minutes, observing her form. She was so still and her breathing so steady, I thought she was sleeping, but a movement of her hands said otherwise. So I moved to lie beside her and replaced her arms with mine. I was drawing some strength from her. This was all I had, and I knew she was just giving me time to hold her…before the inevitable separation. Her warmth was soothing me, making me hold her tighter.

"Bella," I whispered, kissing her neck. Etching the feel and taste of her in my memory so I would have something to hold onto as I wallowed in the emptiness that was to be my life. Her skin broke into goose bumps and I knew she was still affected by me. She placed and intertwined her fingers with mine as a response.

"I love you," she said after several minutes of complete silence. It was so soft that I was afraid it was all in my imagination. When she gripped my hands, I knew it was in confirmation to her declaration of love. "I'm losing myself every time I give in to you and your mother. I have done that for so long and I don't think I can do it any longer."

I closed my eyes, allowing the tears to fall down. I didn't want her to see my tears so I reined in the pain. I would just let all my emotions loose when I was back at the apartment. I wiped the traitorous tears and hugged her again, but I knew she heard me because she tightened her arms on mine for comfort.

"Are you angry at what I said about the baby?" I asked softly. It was stupid of me to ask because even I believed she should be angry with me for what I had said.

I could still remember the exact words that left my lips. '_You abort that thing! We're not ready to have a baby yet, Isabella. I'm not ready to be a father. Get rid of it!' _The cruelness of the words stung me as if I heard it from someone else…as if I wasn't the one who uttered those harsh words to the one I loved most. I cringed just thinking about it. I had allowed my mother, yet again, to influence my thinking. She had influenced me on every thing she thought was trivial, like sacrificing birthdays and anniversaries in favor of improving our business...and I had let her do it. Even with Bella's pregnancy. Esme hadn't said as much, but implied all too knowingly, she was still too young to be a grandmother. My mother being the one to inform me of my wife's pregnancy initially shocked me and eventually angered me, but not for the reason Bella thought. I was, in fact, ready to have a baby. I wanted it so badly. The fatigue of the week's business deals and the shock of the information laid upon me just took over. Not to mention, my mother being in the room as I made the call just added to the pressure. There was no excuse in the world for me to have spoken to Bella like an asshole that night. Maybe if I just ignored the irritated glances my mother was giving me across the room or if I had just shut her out for a few minutes, I would still have my wife and the baby she was carrying in her womb with me.

"At first," she answered as she sighed. "But then I thought about the nights we had talked about our future. I remember you mentioning children. The passion and joy I heard from you when you talked about kids was what made me believe in you…and hoped you didn't mean all those words."

Even when I had hurt her so horribly, she was still the one comforting…understanding. I was amazed at her ability to forgive all my misgivings towards her and the baby.

"Edward, you shouldn't still blame yourself for your father," she said. I stiffened, not wanting to talk about my past. It was another painful time in my life. She had insisted numerous times that the death of Edward Sr. wasn't my fault. I wanted so badly to believe her. If only I could make my mother or myself believe it too, then my life would have been easier. I remained quiet, not wanting to go to that sore topic of my father's death.

"Do you love me?" she asked after a few minutes of silence. She suddenly shifted in my arms so I was facing her as she waited, her eyes were full of anticipation.

"Yes, Bella," I poured my heart into my words, wanting more than anything for her to believe me at that moment. "I love you so fucking much, it hurts."

She sighed, maybe in relief. I wished it was because she wanted to hear me say those words to her. Her eyes shined with unshed tears. "If you really love me the way you say, then you go now," she said softly, but the confidence lacing her words was undeniable. "Leave me alone now. Please."

I knew my time was up. I took a deep breath, flooding my nose with her scent, locking it to memory. I reluctantly released my arms from around her with a heavy heart, and left her alone.

As I passed the living room, my eyes landed on the divorce papers I had brought earlier. They were lying on top of the coffee table conspicuously. I knew then what I could give her to make it all better for her.

I signed the papers, releasing her from our legal bond. Somehow, even as my heart was shattering into a million pieces, I felt I had done this one good thing for her by finally freeing her from me.

I closed my eyes, hoping this wouldn't kill me.

* * *

_**Thank you to everyone reading...and reviewing. ;D**_


	4. Chapter 4 Smiles & unexpected encounters

**Twilight is not mine. Obviously**.

**Thank you to _A__ Jasper For Me_ for helping me with this chapter. Tweaked with this one after I received from beta, so all mistakes are mine.**

**This story will be short. I don't know how many chapters it will be just yet but it won't go over 15.**

**Thank you for all the alerts/reviews. ;D**

**Oh, for those who are asking...I post once a week (no day in particular...but when I have a chapter ready and when I feel like it).**

**

* * *

**

**Chapt****er 4 – Smiles and unexpected encounters**

I swirled the pen between my fingers, trying to look as if I was attentively listening to the executives explaining their presentation. Their graphs and market share studies just weren't really registering in my head. I was looking but I couldn't see anything. I heard small details like the financial gain Cullen Holdings Inc. would make upon the acquisition of one small company in New Orleans, but nothing else. It was all a blur to me.

This was what my life had become ever since I had left Bella in Forks last December. Empty, devoid of any inspiration. I was like a walking zombie…a robot. Waking up in the morning was more a task than a need.

My mother was beside me, looking regal as ever and so daunting in her expensive dress that seemed inappropriate for this company meeting.

My attention shifted back to the men talking and still proceeding with their reports. I was looking at them but I couldn't really see them. The words coming out of their mouths were muted to my ears. I nodded at the appropriate time, making the best impression that I was a good listener. After all, I was the CEO. It was my job. The same one that wasn't making me happy in any way. Not by a long shot. Working here never fulfilled me professionally because this was never my passion. I was never happy because this was not my choice. It had always been my mother's.

Bella had known and had understood. She had even encouraged me to resign…to pursue what I really was passionate about – my music, my art.

The urge to do what I loved was great but it had again taken a back seat as I cowered from all the possible consequences of my resignation. I should have listened to Bella. She was always right.

This corporation my mother had taken over when my father died was her world. She wanted it to be mine as well. I did act as if I wanted it. Faked that this all mattered. I had lost the most important person in my life when this job made every thing else insignificant.

This firm and the business deals, however, was a reprieve of some sorts now. When before it was a chore, now it was a source of my sanity, helping me get away from the pain and go on living the lonely existence that was my life.

As we wrapped up the meeting, I hurried to escape my mother but she halted my exit. The familiar manicured hand softly tapped me on my shoulder, forcing me to acknowledge her. She knew I was ignoring her. I couldn't help it. She was the reason why my life was fucked up. I had a hand in my marriage dissolving. I knew that. I even acknowledge it. But I had to direct my anger somewhere…and my mother was the only target. I wanted her to be the target because she was the cause of all this. But however angry I was, I was still a good son and could never just disregard her.

She linked her hand on my arm as I assisted her while we walked. This show of affection was rare from my mother. It was something she didn't want anybody to see because it was a sign of weakness. As she got closer, I could smell her perfume. The scent used to comfort me, making me somewhat relieved that I still had one parent alive. But now, it irritated my nostrils, engulfing me and making me want to gag. Not because it smelled bad, but because it reminded me that my mother was here with me and not Bella. I had made my choices and it ended, leaving me with nothing. No wife, no child, no life.

The thought of Bella made my heart skip, rousing it from its sleeping and dormant state. The pain that followed was a comfort in a weird way, maybe because it reminded me that Bella had once been mine.

I made sure my misery wasn't showing though. I didn't want my mother to have that satisfaction. To know that I was miserable like she was.

She had never been happy since my father's death. She had never actually said she blamed me but she had acted as if it was my entire fault. I was there after all. I was the one driving his drunken ass, even if I was too young to be doing it. I was the one on the driver seat when another car hit us, causing him to have severe brain damage. He died and she was devastated. She had tried to mold me into him, and I allowed it. I had my guilt to blame for that.

We have something in common now. She had lost the love of her life because of a fatal accident fifteen years ago. I had lost mine because of my stupidity. I almost chuckled at the absurdity of both our lives.

"Edward, darling…I wanted to talk to you about your birthday next week," she drawled. _Ahhh, my birthday_. I would be turning thirty. The thought of celebrating my birth was not interesting me in the least.

I turned slightly to stare at her and I was sure my irritation was obvious. She ignored me.

"I have talked to Irina and she already contacted a party planner," she narrated as we continued our way towards the elevators, nodding in response to our employees who greeted us. I stopped and faced her, narrowing my eyes. "Mother, I don't want a party."

"But Irina had already made arrangements with that well-known woman…I think her name's Alice. She's the popular person amongst our circle. She does a fabulous job on preparing parties for the rich and famous," she argued petulantly as she pouted, trying to convince me to agree. I scowled, pissed off that she thought she'd get away with this one. "She'll be perfect."

"No, she's not…" I retorted in a gritty voice, as I stepped into the open elevator "…because there won't be a party. I'm not in the mood for one, Mother."

She opened her mouth to say something but the look on my face might have clued her in on my state of mind and she closed it. We remained silent while we rode down to her floor.

There was no point in any kind of merriment. There was nothing celebratory about my life. As I pondered, I couldn't find anything to revel on about at this stage of my life. Nothing would replace the void in my heart. If I could wish for a birthday gift, it would be something I knew would be impossible. There was really only one thing I wanted…or one person…and it was something I knew I couldn't have anymore. She was a thousand miles away in that sleepy town. It had been six months since I had last seen her. That was the time I had given her the divorce she wanted.

"Edward." My mother's voice interrupted me and I raised my eyes to hers. She looked as if she wanted to ask me something but changed her mind. She placed her thin hand on my face before she reached up to kiss me on the cheek. It was an attempt for comfort. That simple gesture again shocked me, but I tried to remain impassive. Ever since I came back from Forks a couple of months ago, my mother started acting weird…out of the ordinary. She sometimes even looked as if she genuinely cared for me. Not only because I was heir to her fortune, but also because I was her son, her flesh and blood.

"Mother, they're waiting for you," I replied, nodding towards the people waiting for her outside the elevator. They were her posse. I ignored the expectant look she was giving me and just remained silent, unresponsive to her stares.

She frowned, knowing she had to step off the elevator soon. I was relieved because I didn't want to fight with her. The tone of her voice earlier told me she wanted to start an argument with me and I wasn't in the mood. I didn't want to get into anything with her, because if I did, I knew I would definitely say something that would hurt her…and I wouldn't regret it. The desire to cut myself from her, from this place was so strong I could taste it. But I couldn't go yet. I still needed to be here in this firm, because I needed the reprieve. However, when I was strong enough…brave enough, I would tell it to her face. I would tender my resignation. Soon. Very soon.

Irina, my mother's personal assistant was waiting for Esme to get off the elevator. She had been with my mother ever since I could remember so she was used to Esme Cullen's eccentricities and her demanding nature. I gave Irina a smile as the doors closed, leaving her with my already irritated mother.

As I made my way towards my car, my phone started ringing.

"Hello," I answered, pushing the electronic key to get the door of my car open.

"Is this Mr. Edward Cullen?" a voice asked.

"Yes," I answered, sliding inside the sleek sports car. The voice was unfamiliar to me.

"This is Northwestern Memorial Hospital and we have your wife here." Bella was in the hospital and that thought alone scared the shit out of me. My hands started trembling, conjuring up the worse scenarios in my head where she was hurt badly.

"What happened to her?" I yelled. My voice was shaky and the panic was starting to overwhelm me.

"Sir, please just come over…and we will explain it here." The way she said it terrified me more. Dread coursed through my entire body, threatening to engulf me whole. If I allowed the fear and panic to flood me, it would make me powerless to do any thing. I closed my eyes and concentrated on my breathing.

"Hello…hello? Are you still there, sir?" The voice on the other side of the phone was now full of concern.

"Okay, I'll be right over." _Oh, God no! Please don't let something bad happen to her._ My heart was speeding at an abnormal rate, making thudding sounds against my chest. I needed to get to that hospital as soon as I could. The pain she had left when she broke up with me was something, but I knew it would be a whole different story if she would leave this world. I couldn't live in a world where she didn't exist.

The drive to the hospital was done in record time, making me fifteen minutes earlier than I should. I had broken some traffic rules in order to do that. It was a good thing there were no cops to stop me. Luck, perhaps, was on my side just this one time.

The nurse had informed me that the Emergency Medical Identification on a certain Isabella Cullen had my name and number as the contact person for emergency cases. That piece of information baffled me. She should have changed her last name back to Swan. I had expected her to do that, but the surge of happiness I had felt when I heard my last name still attached to hers was undeniable. It felt so good that she was still using it. For whatever reason that was, I was grateful.

_What the hell is she doing in Chicago?_ She was supposed to be in Washington. Last I checked she was living a happy life in that place.

After I had signed the divorce papers and had left her in Forks, I had hired a private detective to follow her around. It lasted for almost a month until I called off the whole thing off. It was bullshit. It was a last resort on my part to hold onto things. I was still in denial then, but realization came and I felt ashamed for my stalking. She had wanted to be left alone and I wasn't giving it to her. I only ever wanted her happiness and she did seem content and more relaxed in that small town. I stopped checking on her and hoped that she remained that way – happy.

The redhead nurse informed me that Bella had fainted at the mall. She had remained unconscious up until the medics brought her here. She was alone and was disoriented when she woke up. That was why they had called me. But she was okay now. The nurse had reassured me and I felt relieved. The relief was so great I could feel the sting of the tears pooling in my eyes.

The scene before me was enthralling. Bella was sitting down on the bed; her legs were dangling as she sipped some water from a cup. Her body was still thin and small like she wasn't pregnant at all, but the bulge on her belly was obvious now. It was protruding and I couldn't take my eyes away from it. It was my child inside.

As I raised my eyes to her gorgeous ones, she gave me a shy smile that left me breathless. Moving so I was close to her, I raised my hand to cradle her face.

"What happened?" I asked, my heart beating once again, but for a different reason than a while ago. She was here in front of me. Finally. Not something I had conjured up vividly from my imagination. This time around I wouldn't wake up and find her gone. She was truly here, in the flesh.

As I hungrily roamed my eyes all over her small frame, I reveled on her appearance…her close proximity. I had to shake my head to confirm she was not just a figment of my imagination.

Her presence was unnerving me though, making me scared all over again, because it only meant one thing. She would have to leave me again, because there was no more us. She wanted it that way, even if I wanted the opposite. I knew this –me and her…here – was temporary. But I was happy to get these few minutes with her again. She was smiling and friendly…such a treat for me.

"I'm sorry if I disturbed you," she apologized shyly.

"Oh, no…it's okay," I responded, trying to make her comfortable. She continued to sip the water until there was none. She held the empty cup in her hand as she stared at me with those sexy brown eyes that always left me mesmerized. I didn't want to be staring so obviously so I shifted my gaze to her hand on her stomach. She was rubbing the bulge and I was once again transfixed. It was the place holding my child safe. I smiled my first genuine smile in a very long time.

"So, you're still using Cullen, huh?" I asked suddenly, unaware that I had said those words, not until they had left my lips. My eyes widened in shock, afraid she would be insulted. She gave me a tentative smile in response and I sighed in relief that she didn't find any thing wrong about my question.

"Yes, I am."

"Why?"

"Because I'm still one," she said so simply. She bit her lip before she turned away from me. I didn't want to think about the implication of what she said, but it was there. Those words.

My heart started racing again. I didn't want to hope, but I couldn't help it. It was all I could do at the moment.

* * *

_**I love hearing from you guys...so review...please? lol. **_

_**Anyway, whether you press that review button or not, I still want to thank you for reading. See yah next week. *winks***_


	5. Chapter 5 No, not again

**Twilight is not mine. Obviously**.

**Thank you to _A__ Jasper For Me _for helping me with this one.**

**

* * *

**

******Chapt****er 5 – No, not again**

"You're still a Cullen?" I asked, my voice shaking from the emotions that was flowing through me. _Maybe she didn't sign the papers._ My anticipation peaked involuntarily, wanting it to be true.

She held my gaze for a moment and tore it away to adjust her gown. A doctor appeared, giving her the excuse not to answer me.

It was another hour before she was released. I was informed that exhaustion was the cause of her blacking out. Other than that she was okay and the baby was well.

I offered to give her a ride to wherever she would be going, hoping to have a little more time with her. She scrunched her face in contemplation then gave me an uncertain look, making me think she would refuse. She surprised me, however, when she agreed.

As we walked out of the hospital, she kept giving me these meaningful glances that eventually made me self-conscious. I was always confident wherever I was, in whatever I did. I was groomed well by my mother. But when it came to Bella, I was always second guessing myself. She was the only one who could make me feel so vulnerable…it had always been the case.

My father's death changed not only my mother's life but mine as well. It was the pivotal event that made me start questioning myself. The guilt I had felt ate me up and it eventually drove me to allow my mother to make all the decisions for me. To an outsider, I had the cool confidence all Cullen men possessed. Nobody knew that it was all a farce, a mask I had worn to hide all the anxieties and apprehensions that plagued my existence.

My insecurity tripled when I was with my wife. Maybe because deep down I knew she was too good for me and would eventually realize it. Maybe I could also attribute my willingness to succumb to my mother's influence in almost everything because of it.

Maybe.

I sighed and tried to shake all the negative feelings away. The past was just that…the past. I couldn't change any of it even if I tried. I should just enjoy this temporary reunion.

I chanced a glance at her while she wasn't looking and saw that her bulging stomach was making her walk slowly and carefully. Her whole appearance was fascinating to me. I could stand here and watch her for the remainder of the day and I wouldn't be bored in the least. I wanted to hold her hands in mine, but I wasn't sure if she would appreciate it. So I just put my hands inside my pant pockets, preventing myself from giving in to the huge urge to touch her. I should be thankful…grateful that she was here beside me, even if it was only for a short time. It was more than I could have asked for. It was more than I had before I had arrived here in this hospital almost an hour ago.

Her delicate condition gave me an excuse to help her into my car. Her skin felt so soft and I relished the feel of it.

I wanted this time with her to never end. But she looked exhausted and I knew she needed rest. She had already agreed I could bring her home, wherever that was. I assumed she had checked in to a hotel. We didn't talk about why she was in Chicago. Maybe she was here to visit some old friends. But whatever the reason was, I was happy she was here.

As I maneuvered the car through the downtown traffic, I braved to reach for her hand and intertwined my fingers with hers. She tried to pull away but I pleaded with my eyes and she eventually relaxed. I needed the comfort and her warmth did that.

She would never know how the simple gesture of having her hand in mine affected me so. It was like a balm that soothed me. I needed it. I wanted it, especially after that scare in the hospital. I thought something bad had happened to her and had welcomed that sight of her, sitting on that hospital bed looking well and good. It was not enough however. A simple touch coming from her, however small it was, would ease my distress. And she was doing it now, whether she knew it or not.

Maybe she felt my need for her because there was no indication of her earlier reluctance. There was no sign she wanted me away. She didn't try to pull away, allowing her hand to stay in mine as I drove. She directed me towards the familiar streets of my neighborhood and I was confused. She might have seen my bafflement because she continued on explaining she lived in the same block as my apartment. _Our old apartment_. Yes, I still lived there. I wouldn't leave the place where I had so many memories with her. Even if I could, I chose not to. I needed to still be connected with her in some way.

There were so many questions running through me, I didn't know where to start.

I wanted to tell her I was happy she chose to live nearby, but I didn't. I stayed quiet, choosing at the moment to just make up reasons in my mind as to why she was here…all of them because of me.

She invited me in and I couldn't say no. I didn't want to. I tried not to show my excitement, because I didn't want to scare her. That was the last thing I wanted.

Her apartment looked pristine. It looked like she had been here for some weeks now, maybe even months. But again, I didn't say any thing. I didn't want to. It wasn't important.

She was. Nothing mattered but her…and my child.

I continued to follow her inside her apartment, not really knowing what to do. I certainly didn't want to go. She looked at me and I knew she was tired.

"I'll help you to bed, Bella," I said softly, wishing she would agree. All the time with her was precious. I wouldn't know how long I had until she decided to say goodbye again. Even if I knew where she lived, I couldn't just go back to stalking her. But then again, I just might.

"No, I'm fine," she said softly and raised her eyes to me. Those brown soft eyes were so sad. I tried to empathize but it was overwhelming me. I pulled her to me, unable to hide the need to have her close.

"I'm sorry…I'm so sorry," I sobbed as I hugged her to my chest. There was never a chance for me to apologize to her before. She snaked her arms around my waist and we stood that way, her big belly pressed on my thighs, preventing me from getting close to her the way I wanted. "Oh, God…baby, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Her shoulders were shaking and I started rubbing my hand on her back to soothe her. It wasn't good to stress her. "Shhh, shhh…it's alright. Don't cry, baby." It was another stupid thing for me to do, upset her now that I saw her again.

I led her to her couch and sat down. I cradled her as I waited for her sobbing to stop, my hands involuntarily rested on her belly. I had so many things to make up for, even if we just stayed friends because of the baby.

Yes, the baby. I needed to tell her I wanted the child. That I wanted to be in our baby's life. Maybe hers too, that is, if she would ever forgive me.

She raised her blotchy eyes to mine when she had herself under control, and sniffled before she gave me a smile. I reached to wipe her tears away.

"What happened earlier, Bella? Why were you in the mall?" I asked as she sighed. I pulled her back to me so she was resting her head on my chest.

"I was shopping for the baby," she said so softly I almost didn't hear her. "I'm almost due and I still don't have his things ready."

_His_. She said his. The baby was a boy. I would have a son. My heart swelled and I couldn't help but be proud I would be having an heir that would carry my name.

I knew I had never shown her the baby was important to me. I had been so scared that she would deny me of my right to the child because of my actions, that I had purposely alienated myself from her pregnancy. By not talking about it with her, I was not risking the possibility of another let down that would inevitably be another blow to my already shattering heart. It was a selfish act, but it was the only thing I could do to be able to cope. I wasn't proud about it.

I never got the chance to tell her I wanted the child as much as I wanted her. I dreaded to know what she thought about me now. I was a failure, as a husband and as a father. But seeing her again gave me renewed vigor. I was determined to set things straight with her about my son. As soon as I could.

"You're all alone," I stated, voicing my earlier observation since I had seen her in the hospital.

"Well, Ali is out of town and I was bored," she answered matter-of-factly. _Who the hell is Ali? _Not wanting to make an impression I was intruding in her life, I postponed asking who Ali was.

"Why didn't you go home to Phoenix?" The thought that she was alone bothered me. She was pregnant and she needed her family. I wasn't her family anymore. I had relinquished my rights to it when I signed that divorce paper. I wondered why she didn't go home to her mother in Arizona. She wouldn't be alone there and she would be cared for and loved…that was the important thing.

She raised her head and looked at me uncertain, as she bit her lip. I saw something in her eyes but wasn't quite sure what it was. I shrugged. It wasn't important. All I wanted and needed was in my arms.

"It's not my home anymore," she replied so simply. I felt guilty once again. This was all my fault.

I closed my eyes so I wouldn't cry in front of her again. I took a long deep breath and built up my courage. This was a step I needed to take. It had to be done now before I could chicken out. "Do you want me to go with you to buy things for the baby?" I looked at her expectantly, my heart thudding loudly in my chest, as her eyes quickly snapped to check my face. "That is…when you're up for it. You still need your rest."

She gave me a toothy grin, as if she liked what I had just said, nodding her head in agreement. My heart started racing in excitement. The twinkle in her eyes encouraged me to keep touching her, but suddenly she yawned and I knew we couldn't postpone getting her to bed. She needed her rest as well as the baby.

I accompanied her to her room, obsessed to make every minute with her count. Now that I was here, I couldn't seem to stay even a few feet away from her. I knew this need was crazy.

She motioned for me to lay down with her on the bed. Within minutes, she was sleeping as I held her close to me. Whatever the hell this meant, I could and would accept it. Especially if this was what she could give me. However small this was, I would take it. I was certain it would be hard for me, maybe even harder than the last time, when I would be without her again. But all the pain I have to endure would be worth it just to have this moment with her.

~ oO=Oo~

The ringing of her telephone interrupted my musing. I removed my arms from her; afraid she would wake up from the insistent ringing of the phone that could be heard from her open door and find me wrapped around her. She might freak.

Just as I made my way to the living room, the ringing stopped and her voice mail started.

"Good evening, Miss Swan. I'm sorry for calling this late," the voice said. Something in my gut told me I needed to hear this. "But I'll be leaving for Brazil tomorrow and wanted to tell you that I had talked to Mr. Cullen's attorney and they basically agreed with all our terms. And oh, I'll be sending your copy of the papers as soon as I get back from Brazil. Congratulations, you're a free woman again!"

_She really did divorce me. _This information was like a punch to my stomach. I had thought that her using my name meant something so I had started hoping again. I should have known. This wasn't some kind of fairytale where I got my happy ending. By now, the trembling started again and my chest burned in pain. I was having a hard time breathing so I sat down on the floor, trying to concentrate on getting myself in control.

"Call me if you need anything. Bye." There was a click and there was silence.

Just like my life.

Again, the bleakness threatened to engulf me, so before I totally lose myself to it, I had to get away from here. And that was what I did.

* * *

_**Thank you for reading. ;D**_


	6. Chapter 6 Hello again

**Twilight is not mine. Obviously**.

**To _A__ Jasper For Me, _**a big smooch to you babe. You're super fast and I love it. ;D

To **EBS**, thank you.

Maybe another three more chapters before I conclude this. This was just some kind of good distraction before I continue with my other story.

* * *

**Chapt****er 6 – Hello again**

The heat-sensored glass door automatically opened and I passed through confidently as I strode out towards the limo that was waiting. Something caught my eye and I turned my gaze. I halted as I took in the sight on the other street. It was Bella. She was standing directly across from where I was standing, looking expectantly at me. My heart started racing and excitement flowed through me inevitably. _What is she doing here?_

As I stared at her, my grin widened when she didn't turn away. Suddenly my giddiness turned into shame as the last time I was with her came back to me. I had left without saying goodbye. I not only disappointed her, but also myself.

But she was standing there, clearly waiting for me to do something about her presence and I became excited again. It was a challenge of some sorts. She had never tried to make me choose between her and my mother, but her waiting there was monumental. I couldn't know if she wanted me to make a choice, but even if she didn't I knew what I had to do. I wouldn't let this chance pass.

I could feel the heavy gaze of my mother as I stood there staring at my wife…ex-wife to be correct. I pulled my gaze away from Bella for a second to look at my mother who was standing beside the limo with Marcus, waiting for me to join them. I was making her wait and she hated that. I could see her face etched with irritation and for the first time, I didn't find it in me to care. I gave her a shrug and a smile before turning towards my Bella again.

I heard my mother's voice. She was calling my name. Shouting to be exact, but I ignored her and crossed the street towards Bella, dodging the incoming vehicles. I would deal with her anger later. This was a step, a big one. While I had gone against her wishes when I married Bella, this was the first time I had ever done anything without compromising with her.

It felt so good, so great.

My exhilaration couldn't be contained and I chuckled as I dashed towards where Bella was standing. When I reached her, she was glowing and her eyes were twinkling.

My decision to go to her had never felt better.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, still panting from the short run. Her tummy was now so big, I was afraid her feet would give way under the weight. I slowly reached for her arm, to hold her just in case she was tired. She was beaming at me and I couldn't help but return her smile. She looked so happy, just like the first time I saw her. Once I opened my mouth, I started babbling…because I wanted her to stay that way. Content. Happy.

"You look nice." That was what left my lips, but what I really wanted to say was 'You're beautiful. You're my life. I love you.'

"Thank you." Her voice was still like music to my ears and my heart started dancing in joy.

"I did some shopping for the baby. I had already sent it to you. Did you get it?"

She nodded. "Yes, I did. You didn't have to, but I appreciate it. Thank you."

"I'm sorry if I didn't say goodbye the other day," I said slowly as I searched her face for any sign of resentment. I didn't see any. "Something came up and I needed to go." I knew I was lying. It wasn't a good start to whatever I wanted with her again, but I didn't need to tell her that I heard she divorced me. It was to be expected that she did.

"It's okay, I'm used to it." She said it in a very nonchalant way, never meaning to hurt me, but still paining me in some way. I should just shrug it like the way she did. I had so many faults that I couldn't blame her if she used it against me. If I was her, I would use it against me.

However, Bella had the best heart. She forgives easily and loves unconditionally, making her my hero.

She invited me for coffee and I quickly agreed, completely pushing the thoughts of the important meeting I had with my mother out of my mind. Bella was more important. It was time for me to show her that.

Twenty minutes later, we were seated in one of my favorite cafés, me with my coffee and her with her tea.

She seemed to be relaxed and pleased about something and I couldn't help feel I had something to do with it. I just grinned at her when she raised her eyes to mine. I hoped she could see the love I still had for her.

The divorce didn't matter. It took me a night to realize that. It was just a piece of paper that could easily reverse if I married her again, that is, if she wanted to get married again, especially to me.

But then again, I had promised myself to put all my energy into getting her back. Instead of my mother's happiness, I should concentrate on mine. Once that was decided, I was able to function more freely and had even gone shopping alone for my son. It was an exhilarating moment to just feel free again. That was three days ago, and I was still riding on my high.

I was content to stay silent just staring at her sipping her tea. I could do that the remainder of the day.

She had other plans though. She held my gaze momentarily, and spoke. "Did you know why I left you after that phone call?"

"Bella, it doesn't matter." I wanted to reassure her she didn't need explanations. I already knew what I did wrong and there was no need to hash it out.

She held her hand up to silence me. After a minute or so, I nodded for her to continue. My heart was racing and my palms were starting to sweat. I was afraid to hear what she had to say. Because even though I had said that the past was not important, which it wasn't anymore, but if it affected my future with her…then it would fuck things up. _Shit!_

"I was willing to take anything you could give me. Any parts of you that you were willing to share," she started as she smiled sadly. "I knew I wanted a life with you. Any way I could have it. I wasn't complaining that you were never with me because all that mattered was you would be with me, however small that time we shared. You were the most important person to me."

The words she had uttered pierced me like a lance and my breathing became labored. She still looked sad but she had a determined look that gave me hope. "Not until the baby." She said this in a whisper and I knew what she meant. She was saying I wasn't the only important person in her life anymore. That I didn't hold that spot alone in her heart. I knew I shouldn't, but I couldn't help be jealous of the baby. She was selfless and I was selfish.

"I wanted this child more than anything," she said so seriously. "But I knew if you tried hard enough to convince me to get rid of it, I would eventually agree. That somehow, you would find a way to coax me to agree with whatever you planned for the baby and it would've been okay with me, even if it really wasn't…because I love you so much."

My eyes widened and I tried to open my mouth to say something, but words couldn't leave my lips. I was shocked to hear her say that she could have aborted the baby if I pressured her enough. My guilt and anger at myself came crashing back and I clenched my fist at my side. At this very moment, I hated myself more than I ever did.

"I had to leave because I didn't want to one day hate you because of my love for you. I couldn't risk it." Her eyes were shining with unshed tears. "I even divorced you because of it."

I was just nodding, trying to block the anger and pain flowing through me.

"The main reason for the divorce was because I wanted a fresh start." It was understandable that she did want that. That was why she had to remove my name with hers legally. So she could start anew.

She was staring at me intently, searching my face for something. Her eyes flickered with some emotion I couldn't decipher as she continued to hold my gaze.

"A fresh start is good," I said softly, interrupting the silence that was surrounding us.

"I want a fresh start with you, Edward." My heart almost jumped out of my chest. She had said the words I wanted to say, but was so afraid to say. "That was why I came here. I came to fetch you, darling."

She always knew what I needed, when I needed it. Today was an example of that.

* * *

_**Thank you for reading. Review to tell me your thoughts. **_


	7. Chapter 7 Sky's the limit

**Twilight is not mine. Obviously**.

**To _A__ Jasper For Me, _**love lots to you. ;D

To **EBS**, thank you.

I have one more chapter before this concludes.

* * *

**Chapt****er 7 – Sky's the limit**

I was staring at her face all crunched up and sweaty from the exertion of pushing. She had been in labor for over six hours now and I had been here with her all that time.

The doctor started to make her push harder because the baby was coming. My worry tripled but at the same time the excitement brewed inside me.

I felt Bella's grip on my hand tighten as she pushed long and hard. After that agonizing minute, she slumped back and I knew my son had arrived.

Leaving Bella's side, I peeked at the small creature Dr. Hale was holding. I stood there amazed and transfixed on the very tiny baby being cleaned and checked thoroughly.

Just then he cried and I worried again. Was he okay? I almost snatched him away from the nurse that was now holding him. My expression might have been one of alarm because Dr. Hale started explaining that he was in no danger. It was just a routine procedure.

My immediate protectiveness surprised me, but it didn't scare me any longer. I even relished on the feeling.

I went back to check on my Bella when I was certain that the baby was well. She looked exhausted but her eyes were twinkling and her face was glowing. She never looked more beautiful than this moment, the moment she had given me a son.

I kissed her forehead and wiped the sweat from her face. She was dying to see our baby, so I got him for her. Once my son was in her arms, I could see the happiness radiating from her and I knew I was blessed in more ways than one.

She was whispering some things to the baby I couldn't hear, and I was fascinated at the picture they painted. Seeing the only family I needed in front of me gave me the contentment and peace I had never felt.

When she raised her eyes, the love reflected there couldn't be denied. She held her hand to mine and whispered, "I love you."

My answer was a kiss on her lips.

She was all I needed. The baby was just another wonderful gift from her.

"Anthony," she said so softly as she caressed the baby's cheek so tenderly. "I want his name to be Anthony." She raised her eyes to me again, as if seeking confirmation. "I want him to have your name, baby."

That simple gesture made my heart swell and I was afraid I would cry. I blinked my eyes, willing the tears to go away.

"Thank you." It was all I could say, but it was a good summation of what I felt.

"No, thank you. You gave him to me," she said, and I couldn't stop the tears from falling even if I tried. I wiped them, as I bent over to kiss her again.

~i!~

"You can't do this, Edward!" My mother was angry and I couldn't blame her, but she wasn't my priority any longer. Almost my entire life was dedicated to appeasing her. I had tried to make it up to her for taking the love of her life away by doing every thing she had asked of me. I still had some guilt but it wasn't the driving force to my life any longer.

"Mother, I'm sorry, but this is for the best," I said, trying so hard not to snap at her. She looked angry, but her eyes depicted her sadness. I pitied her. I was unhappy with what I had done with my life, but I still had time to rectify it, while she didn't. She was miserable and I couldn't help her be happy anymore. She needed to do it herself.

I had tendered my resignation and I was holding a copy of that letter. She was infuriated and it was okay. There was nothing she could do to change my mind.

"Edward, you can't leave. I need you," she whined and I felt sad.

"I'm not leaving you, Mother. I just need to do this," I supplied, putting the letter on the table next to me. "You have to give this to me."

With that, I turned away. I didn't hear any sound and I was surprised, but I didn't turn around, afraid I would see something that would change my mind.

~i!~

It had been a month since Bella accepted me back. It had been two weeks since we had our son.

I had a much more simple life now, maybe because I didn't have a job so demanding. I wasn't in any rush to get to the office because there was a meeting I have to appear at, nor did I have a business deal to close. It was simple, but it didn't mean I was less happy.

Nothing could compare to the serenity my little family had brought me. I was jobless but I planned to rectify that as soon as I could. However, I had the money to live comfortably for the rest of our lives, even if I didn't work another day in my life.

There was something missing to the puzzle that would make it complete though. Not that I didn't relish the time I spent with Bella and Anthony, but I wanted to pursue one of my other passions.

I started scouting places to buy. Jasper Whitlock, an old friend since high school, had suggested we partner in starting a recording studio. It was a very interesting offer and eventually I had agreed. He was already well known in the music business and he would be in charge of that, while I would handle the financial aspect of the business. I was a part of what we hoped would be a good venture for us, and that excited me. It was something I had wanted ever since I had learned how to play the piano when I was five. I knew I was far from where I truly wanted for my career, but it didn't matter. I was on that path, the path I should have taken long ago. I was getting there and that was the important thing.

Bella was supportive as ever. She listened to my plans, my frustrations and my fears. I couldn't thank her enough.

She was my inspiration to do better, to strive harder and most especially, to be just me.

One day, when this was all settled, I would ask her again for her hand. This time around she would have the wedding she had always dreamed of - small and intimate.

A fresh start, just like she wanted.

* * *

_**Thank you for reading. Reviews make me smile.**_


	8. Chapter 8 They are here

**Twilight is not mine. Obviously**.

**To _A__ Jasper For Me, _**the chapters wouldn't be what it was if it weren't for you**...so thank you. Love.** D

This is the last chapter. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

**Chapt****er 8 – They are here**

I stared at her lying next to me. Her long dark lashes were a stark contrast to her pale skin. Even in sleep she seemed to hate the small space separating us as she snuggled closer. She rested her hand on my chest and the ring on her finger caught my attention, making me smile.

She was my wife again; just six hours ago we exchanged vows in front of people that mattered, people like Alice and Jasper who were in our lives not because of social status or financial gain. The whole ceremony was simple, but perfect…perfect for the both of us. It felt the same, but still very different. Like déjà vu. The emotions coursing through me, however, were real and strong, not a dream or a remembrance.

She stirred and I kissed her forehead.

I whispered my love for her and she smiled. Maybe she heard me in her dreams. Good. It was what I wanted. Whether or not she was awake or asleep, I needed her to have no doubts about what I felt for her. Her entire being was the fuel to my existence. She was my dream. This was all I needed, her and I…together, always.

However much I loved my son, she was still the most precious thing to me. I never questioned that. I had already accepted I couldn't live without her.

I felt a soft caress and noticed she was staring at me. I gave her a lazy smile.

"Did I wake you, babe?" She shook her head and reached for my lips.

"I love you." Her words still left me breathless. She meant it, I was sure.

"You're my life, Bella." Her eyes filled with tears, maybe because she knew I meant it too.

She pulled my hands and intertwined our fingers, the metal of our rings touching each other in a caress, mirroring what our bodies were doing.

We lay there wrapped in each other. The soft touches scorched our skin but never burned. This silent exchange meant more than words. The love that never faded flowed between us.

~i!~

My son had Bella's coloring but he had most of my features. The hair, the nose and the eyes…they were all mine.

He was the apple of my wife's eye, the only other person that seemed to make her complete.

Her eyes sparkled more now and her smile was sweeter. It was all because of Anthony, he made her happier, which in turn made me ecstatic.

If he was the reason for the sparkle in Bella's eyes, he was the one that saved my life, my savior. The events that led us here, to where we were now, where it was not all rainbows and sunshine. I couldn't regret any of it…not one bit. Anthony was the one reason my Bella had the strength to leave me. It had hurt so badly, but the pain led me to realize all my faults. It made me braver.

My son, I loved him and I would tell him so he would never doubt it.

I would be forever grateful for everything that happened which led me here with Bella and my son.

I had a lot of things to work on and it wouldn't be easy, not at all. I had no delusions about that but Bella and Anthony were here. That was all that mattered, all I needed. Everything else could fade to black.

I was ready; my angels were behind me all the way.

I smiled. I would be okay…we would be okay.

I just knew it.

* * *

_**This is marked complete. **_

_**To everyone who read/alerted this story, thank you. I enjoyed the time I spent writing this.**_

_**My other story will be continued now that I had finished this. That will have longer chapters, so please check it out - Buried in Words.**_


End file.
